


Angel Wings and Broken Things

by KataleesaSkywalker



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Canon, Angel Castiel, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angsty Schmoop, Bobby's House, Case Fic, Castiel & Sam Winchester Friendship, Crowley & Dean Winchester Friendship, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Drama, Family Feels, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Friendship/Love, Grandparent Bobby, Humor, Infidelity, Kid Fic, Kidnapping, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, Parents Castiel & Dean Winchester, Rowena being Terrible, Semi-Slow Build Castiel/Dean, Tea Parties, Uncle Gabriel, adorable dads
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 18:37:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8764459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KataleesaSkywalker/pseuds/KataleesaSkywalker
Summary: Dean Winchester has always been a bit of a ladies man. One night stands were the only affection he allows himself to have, because in the hunter's life, you can't afford attachments. Especially attachments to a Winchester. One day he gets the call that he has a 5-year-old daughter, and that her mother has died under mysterious circumstances. His life is turned upside down, and now he needs to decide what he wants to do with the little girl, find out what really happened to her mother, and deal with the feelings he has for a certain angel in a trench coat that are getting harder to hide with each passing day.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is set somewhere after the Darkness is gone and the world is back to normal.

Dean Winchester stared at the cell phone in his hand as if it had done him a personal injustice. In a way it had, with the news it had just given him. He had truly begun to think that there was no longer anything in the world that could surprise him anymore. The Devil rising, angels falling, getting blown into Purgatory by an exploding Dick, hell even the Darkness _herself_ becoming corporeal and God making pancakes in their bunker kitchen... that was all just a normal week in the life of a Winchester. 

Getting told that you have a 5-year-old daughter from a random one night stand, now _that_ was far different than any of the other crap.

He supposed he should have expected that this would happen eventually. Sure, he always made sure to use 'wrap it up' just in case. But condoms were only 99% effective, after all, and that 1% was always ready to bite you in your ass when you least expected it. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry at life's cruel karmic jokes. Maybe both, at this point.

If he was being honest with himself, he would admit that there was always that part of him, deep down beneath the self-loathing angst and alcoholism, that wanted to be a dad. The time spent with Ben and Lisa had only affirmed that fact. He had enjoyed teaching Ben how to work on cars, watching movies together, or playing sports with him. It almost seemed _right_ for a time, like things were finally making some sort of sense.

Then the cold hard truth reared it's ugly head as it always did - life as a hunter didn't leave much time for ballgames and PTA meetings.

The apple pie life had always scared him, and sometimes he wondered if he would rather face a nest full of monsters than settle down in suburbia. It was Sam who always wanted normalcy, not Dean. He had resigned years ago that he would be nothing more than a soldier, a nameless man who saved people from things they didn't know existed outside of fairy tales. He was the one who helped keep their delusions of safety firmly intact. And now, there was a small life with _his_ cursed DNA coursing through her veins, and he felt sorry that life had dealt her such a bad hand and given her Dean Winchester as a father.

He barely registered his moose of a brother snapping his fingers in front of Dean's face, and the concerned blue eyes of an angel of the Lord peering at him from across the table.

"Dean? Dean!" Sam's worried voice broke through his muddled and hazy thoughts.

He blinked once, twice, looking around and remembering where he was. Oh, yeah. They were at Karen's Diner off of Route 66, and on their way to hunt a wendigo or something like that. It all seemed like a big blur. He took a deep breath, putting the phone on the table and leaning back in the booth. "Yeah... sorry."

"Dean, what's going on?" Castiel asked, those blue eyes squinting as he studied the speechless hunter. "Was it bad news? Is someone hurt?"

Dean looked up finally, his throat feeling like it was made of sandpaper. "I... uhh..." He wiped a hand across his brow. Well, he might as well just spit it out already. "I have a kid."

Now it was Sam and Castiel's turn to be shocked into silence, which was perfectly fine with Dean. He still hadn't quite wrapped his mind around the whole situation. At first, he had thought it had been some kind of sick joke when some guy on the other line told him that Sarah Newman had died and that Dean was listed as the father of her child.

"Dude, are you serious?" Sam replied, resting his gargantuan limbs on the table.

"No, Sammy. I'm making it all up!" Dean snapped, a little too loudly."Yes, I'm fucking serious, okay?"

"Dean, please calm down. Just tell us what happened," Castiel said gently, and not for the first time, the older Winchester was grateful to have the angel as his best friend.

"Remember that hunt in Wren Falls almost 6 years ago?" Dean asked, reaching out and grabbing his now lukewarm glass of water on the table. 

"Yeah... the ghost hunt, right? Man killed his wife and mother in law, then himself," Sam recounted, his hazel eyes getting that faraway look when he scanned through his memory banks.

Dean swore sometimes he thought his brother was some kind of overly intelligent android with the way he could remember even the smallest detail. "Yeah, and I hooked up with Sarah Newman, the maid who found the bodies..."

Sam slipped into bitch face #42. "Oh my _God_ , Dean, you didn't."

"Apparently I _did_ because now there's another Winchester running around." Dean raked a hand through his sandy brown hair. "Anyway, that's not even the worst of it."

"How can it get any worse?" Sam's voice was shrill now, and it got the attention of nearby customers. Sam avidly ignored them, his eyes fixed on his brother.

"Sarah's dead. 'Mysterious Circumstances', apparently" he answered, complete with air quotes.

"Mysterious, like..."

"Like maybe our kind of thing, I don't know." Dean sighed and chugged down the water, which he had been holding tensely in his sweaty hand.

Castiel looked sympathetically at him. "I'm sorry for your loss, Dean."

"I didn't know her that well," the hunter mumbled, "Just sucks for the kid. Not sure what to do about that."

"Does she have any other family?" Sam asked slowly. "And how do you know she's even yours?"

Dean shrugged. "As far as family, apparently I'm all she's got. And we can find out the paternal part of it when I get there."

"When _you_ get there... as in you're going alone?" Sam demanded.

"Well yeah. We're on a case, man. Can't just leave it right now."

"Would you like me to take care of the wendigo while you two go to Wren Falls?" Castiel suggested. "That way we can take care of both issues."

The brothers exchanged a look. A million conversations passed between them without even uttering a word.

"How about you go with Dean?" Sam replied finally, with an encouraging smile. "We know what we're dealing with here, but we're kind of in the dark about what's going on in Wren Falls."

"Yes, but this is a family matter, isn't it?" Castiel asked, his blue eyes sliding across to meet bright green. "Perhaps Sam would be better to - "

Dean put up a hand, silencing his protests. "Yeah, Cas. You're right. This _is_ a family matter, and last time I checked, you're family. So get your feathery ass in the car and let's roll."

The angel smiled, a look of gratitude on his face as he rose from the booth and walked outside without another argument. Sam flagged down the waitress for the check.

"You sure you'll be okay?" Dean asked, as he slipped his cell back into his jacket pocket and stood up. "This whole thing can wait a day or two - "

"I can handle one wendigo, man. Just go and get your kid. And if nothing else, I'll pray to Cas if things get hairy." Sam smirked at his own horrible pun, and Dean rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I'll call you when we get into town." Dean hugged his brother, giving him a clap on the back. "Be careful, okay?"

"What's with the touchy-feely, Dean?" Sam asked with a chuckle. "Going soft already?"

Dean shot him a glare. "A man can't hug his giant brother? Fuck off, Sammy."

Sam laughed and went to pay the bill, while Dean headed out to the Impala.

 

 

 

Luckily, the drive to Wren Falls was only going to take a few hours, so Dean and Castiel sat in comfortable silence most of the way. It had always been like that for the two of them, especially in the past few months since Chuck Shurley had reappeared and announced that he had been God the whole time. Then, of course, there was that whole mess with the Darkness (his super creepy sister who had some weird ass crush on Dean). Chuck had retaken Heaven and fixed it... the way it _should_ have been fixed a long time ago before anyone with wings and a stick up their ass decided they were better suited for the job than God Himself. 

He formed a peace treaty with Crowley so that, for the first time in forever, the Winchesters and Castiel weren't going to be forced into anymore Heaven Vs. Hell battle royals, much to their relief. He also told Castiel that the angel was forgiven for all his past transgressions, and gave him the option of staying in Heaven with God and the angels, or staying on Earth with the Winchesters as their permanent guardian angel. Needless to say, Castiel all but threw confetti in the air when he landed in Sam and Dean's motel room with the announcement that everything was awesome and Castiel was free to choose his own life.

Dean had been shocked that the angel ended up choosing to stay with the brothers in seedy motels and going on mundane hunts over being in Heaven with his family. Sam, on the other hand, wasn't surprised in the least. Dean supposed he knew the _real_ reason Castiel had stayed, but that wasn't a truth he was ready to deal with just yet.

Or  _ever_.

"Are you alright?"

He jumped a little at the gravelly voice next to him, almost forgetting the angel was there while he sorted through his thoughts. He smiled over at the passenger seat, where Castiel looked at him with concern. "Yeah, Cas. I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

Of course he knew. Castiel always _knew_. He was the only one besides Sam who had gotten a glimpse of the real Dean Winchester, after all.

The hunter tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, staring at the lines on the road for a minute before answering. "I'm... afraid."

The angel nodded. "That's to be expected, Dean. You are suddenly a father, now. The fact that you are afraid shows that you will make a good one."

Dean raised a brow. "Why would me being afraid make me a good Dad?"

"Because it means you are concerned about the well-being of your daughter. You're worried you will screw this up somehow."

It sometimes unnerved Dean the way the angel could read him like a book. "I don't know if I can do this," Dean whispered, feeling incredibly vulnerable.

Castiel was silent for a moment, as he stared out the window at the passing landscape. "It's funny, you know."

"Huh? What is?"

"You worry so much about how good you will be as a father, when you have already raised a child and done a fantastic job."

Dean glanced sideways at his best friend. "You mean Sam?"

"Yes, Dean." Castiel smiled at him. "You were more of his father to him than John Winchester ever was, and I'm sorry to say that, but it's the truth. You are the one who raised him, who went hungry so he didn't have to, who stole so he could have clothes on his back, who took every beating your father gave just so Sam wouldn't be hurt... You need to give yourself more credit for what an amazing parental figure you are."

Dean felt emotion stir in his chest and he blinked away the tears that threatened to escape. "How did you... how did you know about all that?"

The angel looked away again, folding his hands across his lap. "When I raised you from perdition, I rebuilt every part of you. Piece by piece, memory by memory. I-I saw inside you, Dean."

Dean huffed a laugh. "And still you haven't turned away. Told me I am a monster..."

"I will always be here for you, Dean. All you have to do is ask."

The words hung between them for a long time as Dean stared straight ahead, willing himself not to let the tears fall. The angel in the trench coat had been an important staple in his life for almost 9 years now, and he truthfully couldn't imagine his life without him. He had always tried to keep Castiel at a distance though, believing the awkward blue eyed man with the backwards tie could do so much better than hang around two hunters with daddy issues and a track record for breaking the world. He just couldn't bring himself to tell him to get lost, and maybe he was selfish that way. But he knew that there was a part of Castiel that was being just as selfish, choosing to stay on Earth with humans instead of back in Heaven with his family.

Sometimes it was hard to tell which of them was more broken.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean and Castiel arrived in Wren Falls shortly before 7 p.m. that night. Dean could feel his heart beating faster in his chest the closer he drove to the hospital where his daughter was staying until he could come get her. 

His daughter. He would never get used to that. He still didn't even know her name...

They parked the Impala in the massive underground garage, and for a few minutes, Dean simply sat there with his hands still on the steering wheel, as if it would give him the power and strength to go inside and face a 5-year-old child. It seemed almost ludicrous. He had battled a laundry list of big bads in his day, yet here he was terrified of facing his own flesh and blood. He knew a lot of his anxiety was the worry that she would reject him, maybe even _hate_ him for not being around as he should have been. For all he knew, Sarah had spent the last 5 years telling their daughter what an asshole Dean Winchester was, and how she should avoid him at all costs.

Dean wouldn't blame her, really. He had slipped out the morning after and never spoke to her again.

Castiel put a comforting hand on the hunter's arm, and Dean smiled appreciatively at him. "It will be okay, Dean. She will love you."

As usual, Castiel always knew what Dean was afraid of. Family was everything to him, and he didn't think he could take it if the littlest Winchester told him she wanted nothing to do with him.

He finally slid out of the car and walked towards the hospital, with Castiel next to him keeping a watch on their surroundings. As the elevator doors opened to the same floor that his daughter was on, Dean felt his heart pound in his chest once more, and he barely noticed as the angel placed a gentle hand on his elbow and led him to the room. Once they got there, Castiel released him and sat down in a nearby chair that was right outside the door.

"I will wait here for you. Call me if you need anything."

"You're not coming in?" Dean said, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Castiel paused for a moment. "If you really wish me to. I don't want to impose..."

"At least come in to make sure I don't pass out on the floor or something," Dean said with a forced laugh. Him passing out on the floor seemed pretty plausible right now.

Castiel nodded and stood again, and Dean finally got the courage to twist the knob of the door and push it open. They both stepped inside - and immediately stared in shock when they saw the little girl sitting on the bed.

There was no need for a paternity test. If she looked any more like Dean Winchester, she would be Dean Winchester.

Bright, moss green eyes stared back at them from beneath chocolate brown curls. A pale freckled face was pressed against a stuffed unicorn plush that she hugged to her chest. "Wh-who are you?" the girl whispered.

Dean looked back at Castiel, who nodded and inclined his head towards her. He took a deep breath. "Hi, there. I - I'm your dad, kid. Sorry about that." He cleared his throat awkwardly.

"My dad? As in Dean?"

He nodded. "Yep. That's me. Listen, I'm sorry that - "

He couldn't finish his sentence, because a little body suddenly hurled into him and wrapped her arms tightly around his waist as if Dean was her lifeline. He froze for a moment, surprised by the affection she showed. When she began to tremble with sobs, he immediately scooped her up in his arms and held her close. "Shh, it's okay, I'm here now."

When she had calmed down a little bit, he set her down. "I can't believe you're really here," she whispered, her green eyes full of adoration that he didn't expect.

"Your mom told you about me, then?" Dean inquired, suddenly afraid for the answer.

"Yes. She told me that you rescue people. That you're a hero." The little girl beamed up at him. "She said I should be proud to have you as my father."

The hunter didn't know what to say. He was so used to feeling so negative about himself, that he expected other people to say bad things, too. "I'm sorry... that I haven't been here for you."

The girl shrugged. "Saving people is more important. Besides, you're here now, right?"

"Right. Always."

She looked over at the man in the trench coat, who had been silent the whole time, and her gaze filled with awe. "You're Castiel."

The angel tilted his head. "You know about me?"

The little girl rushed over and hugged him tight, her small hands fisting the tan trench coat. "Yes! You're an angel! Mommy told me all about you, too. You helped saved her." Castiel wrapped his arms around her after a brief moment of hesitation and returned the hug. "Thank you."

Dean thought back to the night he had met Sarah. She had witnessed the ghost problem firsthand, and saw Castiel smite one of them right in front of her. Finding out that angels were real had given her a new sense of faith in the world, and a hope that one day all the things she had done in the past would be forgiven. He felt a tear slip down his face at the thought that her life had been taken way too early, and that this little girl had been left without her mother, just like he had. Before he realized it, a tiny hand was pulling on his shirt and he looked down into all too familiar green eyes.

"It's okay, Daddy, don't cry. Mommy is in Heaven now with the angels."

Dean's breath hitched at the statement, and even Castiel looked pretty emotional from it.The angel walked over to him and put a hand on the hunter's shoulder, and smiled down at the little girl.

"It's true. Your mother is in her own personal Heaven with your grandparents."

At the angel's confirmation, the little girl nodded in gratitude. "Then Mommy will be okay, and one day I'll see her again."

"What's your name?" Dean asked gently. "They never told me."

"Faith Deanna Winchester," the little girl answered. "Mommy named me after you."

The hunter's phone began to vibrate, and Dean pulled it out. "Hey, Sammy," he answered, glad for a small reprieve from the touching scene.

"Hey. Everything going okay?" Sam asked.

"Yep. We got her here, safe and sound."

"Awesome. Listen, I went through the reports on Sarah. I think it's werewolves. Her heart was ripped out of her chest, and right in front of her daughter Faith, apparently."

Dean winced, looking down at the little girl who was now showing Castiel her unicorn. "Damn."

"I know. Why don't I get Bobby to come meet me and we take care of it so you can take Faith home?"

"No, we owe it to Sarah and Faith to get rid of this son of a - "

"Dean!" Castiel chastised.

"Sorry. This _bad guy_ ," Dean amended, shooting a 'happy now?' face at the angel. Castiel nodded and went back to listening to Faith talk about unicorns and rainbow rivers.

"I'll head up there tonight, and we can take care of the werewolf problem tomorrow."

"Okay, Sammy. See you then." Dean clicked the phone off.

"Is that my uncle?" Faith asked.

"Yep, he's coming down tomorrow so you get to meet him," Dean said, slipping the cell back in his pocket. He paused, trying to figure out how best to approach the delicate situation. He did _not_ want to ask about this, but he needed to know any details he could to help him avenge Sarah. "Faith... what did you see when your mom passed?"

The little girl sat on the bed, gently bouncing the plush toy on her knee. "A monster. He hurt mommy right in front of me. Stole her heart." Her eyes brimmed with tears, and Dean quickly leaned down in front of her, feeling an inner rage boil at the thought of some asshole forcing her to witness such a horrendous act.

"Hey, don't worry. We won't let anyone hurt you, alright? I'm here now, and so is Cas."

"I will always protect you," Castiel said earnestly. "You have my word."

Dean smiled up at the angel. "See? You got an _actual_ guardian angel watching your back! How many people can say that, huh?"

"That's true." Faith wiped her eyes. "Can we leave now? I don't want to be here anymore... it reminds me too much of Mommy."

Dean nodded and offered her his hand, and she took it without hesitation. As he walked out of the room, Castiel stopped him for a moment, his blue eyes filled with question.

"Did he really kill Sarah in front of Faith?" he whispered.

Dean sighed and nodded. "Seems that way."

The angel's face darkened with fury. "He will pay for his transgression." Dean instantly recognized the look on Castiel's face. It meant someone was about to get their asses smited into oblivion.

Dean was just glad that he was going to be there to see it.


	3. Chapter 3

So Dean was a father. Sam knew it would happen eventually. His brother used to think every day was Unattached Drifter Christmas, after all, and eventually that kind of shit caught up to you. But truth be told, Sam was more concerned for Faith, than for Dean. Not because he didn't love his brother, of course, but because Dean already knew what it meant to be a Winchester. It was having a target on your back and constantly fighting for your life. It was trying to save people every day when half the time you couldn't even save yourself. Faith, on the other hand, was a helpless child who had no idea that the DNA that ran through her veins had cursed her forever. Sam knew what that was like all too well, since he and Dean had been cogs in the great battle of Heaven before they were even a thought - before John and Mary had even existed. 

There was a part of him that was happy for Dean, though. Sam knew that his big brother had always wanted to have a kid or two. When Dean had Ben he had taken to parenting like a pro, being the father figure that Ben so desperately needed, and that Sam knew he could be. To this day he regretted walking back into Dean's life during that Djinn hunt. He should have sent Samuel or one of the cousins to take care of the monster problem, but Sam didn't have a soul then, and he didn't care about the consequences of his actions. Dean jumped right back into hunting without a second thought, leaving the apple pie life behind and trading it for seedy motel rooms and whiskey. Sometimes Sam wondered if Dean would still be living with Ben and Lisa now if he had just left his brother alone. 

No, probably not.

Sam had known that Dean and Castiel were in love for years, even if _they_ didn't. He never pushed the issue, because he knew Dean would probably never be able to get past the fact that the angel was in a male vessel. Too many years of John Winchester's homophobic rants and sheer disgust had pushed whatever urges Dean had far below the surface, so far that he was now drowning in denial with no easy way to break the surface and gasp for air. Dean thought Sam never noticed when he would check out other men, or get just a little _too_ happy whenever a certain trench-coated angel was nearby. Did Dean even notice that he had stopped chastising Castiel about personal space? That Dean was more than often the one who would slide right into that close, personal bubble of Castiel's as if it was a completely normal thing to do?

That a millennium old being who had seen worlds rise and fall, always looked at Dean with awe like he was the most amazing thing the angel had ever seen?

Nope. Not Dean Winchester. Not a broken man like him.

It was just past noon, and Sam finally saw Sunny's Motel just up ahead. He had been driving for hours, eager to meet up with his brother and Castiel and take care of the situation together. He pulled into the lot, next to the all too familiar black Chevy Impala. He shut off the engine and reached into the backseat, grabbing his duffel bag and making sure he didn't leave anything behind. The motel room door opened and Castiel stepped out, glancing quickly inside for a moment before shutting the door behind him. Sam slid out of the driver's seat, waiting for Castiel as he approached. He looked troubled about something, and Sam wondered what had happened in the short time that they had been apart.

"Hello, Sam."

"Hey, Cas, everything okay?"

The angel smiled, his blue eyes trailing to the motel room. "Yes. Dean and Faith are taking a nap together." 

"Oh, awesome. Should I get another hotel room?" Sam asked, slinging the bag over his shoulder. 

"No need. There are two beds in there and I don't sleep."

"Alright. How did it go last night?"  
  
Castiel leaned against the hood of the car. "Better than expected. She is a very loving and trusting child. She took to Dean quickly."

"I'm glad. I was kind of worried that she would be put off by his absence her whole life."

The angel shook his head. "She was surprisingly understanding." He looked up at the hunter, a fond look on his face. "She called him a hero."

"Wow, I bet Dean liked that," Sam said with a grin. "But Dean has never been able to take compliments very well."

"True... He didn't know what to say," Castiel chuckled, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his trench coat.

They stood in silence for a few moments, and Sam shifted awkwardly on his feet, wondering why the angel had intercepted him at the door. "Cas, what's wrong?"

Castiel looked off into the distance, the amusement sliding off his face almost instantly. "I think I may need to go back to Heaven."

Sam felt his stomach drop. The angel had become such a huge part of their lives, and Sam loved him like a brother. And Dean... well Dean wouldn't be able to handle it at all if Castiel just disappeared like that. "Don't you like it here, Cas? You've seemed so much happier here since your Dad gave you the okay to live the life _you_ want."

Castiel looked sadly at the younger Winchester. "I love it here, Sam. You, Dean, Bobby... you're my family. And now Faith, of course. I already find myself quite attached to her."

Sam had expected that to happen, because he knew that Castiel had a fondness for children just like Dean did. "Isn't that a good thing? Did something happen in Heaven again? Did God leave?"

"It's nothing in Heaven, Sam. It's..." The angel trailed off, and Sam could see Castiel's lower lip begin to tremble. He quickly put a hand on the other man's shoulder.

"Cas, what is it? You can tell me."

"I'm in love with Dean," Castiel blurted out, running his hands through his already unkempt hair. "And I know my love is unrequited, and now I find myself getting close to his child and one day Dean will find someone else and... I won't be able to handle it Sam." The angel looked at him, and for the first time since Sam met him, he could see all the emotions on Castiel's face. It was like a dam had been broken and all those worries had come tumbling out. "I need to leave before it gets even worse."

Sam stared at the angel, not knowing what to say. The logical part of him screamed that he needed to tell Castiel the truth, but the good brother side of him reminded him that it wasn't his truth to tell. Dean had to be the one to do it. "Have you... told him how you felt?" he said finally.

Castiel huffed a bitter laugh. "I'm not stupid, Sam. Dean likes women, not men. He will reject me and I would lose my best friend forever. At least if I went to Heaven without saying anything it might make things easier."

"So running away is your answer?" Sam snapped, a little too harshly. "Without even knowing if he feels the same?"

"He sees me as a friend, a brother in arms. If Dean felt the same way about me, he would have said something a long time ago."

Sam rolled his eyes. "And here I thought you _actually_ knew him, Cas."

The angel tilted his head to the side in that confused way of his. "What do you mean? Of course I know him, I rebuilt him piece by - "

"No," Sam said, pointing a finger at him. "Because if you did, you would know that Dean Winchester has the emotional capability of a wet sponge. He has never even told _me_ that he loves me. Do you really believe it would be easy for him to just come out and say it? Especially to a holy celestial being of God?"

Castiel pondered that for a moment, his blue eyes squinting as he looked at the ground. "I am not that holy anymore, Sam. I am a broken angel. He deserves far better than that."

Sam could have punched the angel in the face right then, except he knew it would be like hitting a brick wall. Dean had told him that once. The Winchester chose to glare at him instead. "Fine, you think leaving Dean is the best option here, you go ahead and do it. But know this." He got in Castiel's face and the angel actually flinched, expecting a blow to connect with his jaw. "You could have stayed. You could have lived with us for the rest of your life and watched Faith grow up and maybe even have a hand in raising her, and we would have _never once_ kicked you out or called you broken. You are the one who has to live with the consequences of leaving your family that would have loved you forever. And forever's a long time, Cas. You of all people should know that."

"I - I don't know what to say."

"I guess there's nothing to say, since it seems you have made up your mind. Just promise you'll do something for me first."

"What is it?" Castiel said hesitantly. 

"First, I'd appreciate it if you at least waited until after Dean and I handle the case. Faith needs someone to protect her while we are hunting this thing."

"Yes, of course," Castiel said with a nod. 

"And second, I want you to just go. Don't even tell Dean goodbye because he will just beg you to stay. I'll tell him that Heaven decided it needs you again and you went back home. I think that's the best thing for everyone. And after this, never come back. Because I don't think you truly understand the impact your decision will have on us." Sam turned away. "The impact it'll have on Dean."

The angel looked absolutely broken and Sam had to resist the urge to grab him up in a hug. It was one of the most painful things Sam had ever done. He may have loved Castiel, but Dean was his brother, and if that meant pushing the angel away for Dean's sake, then he would do it. He just wasn't looking forward to the aftermath of Castiel's selfish decision to abandon the greatest friend he had ever had. Before he could lose his resolve, Sam snatched up his duffel again and headed inside the motel room, leaving the angel to his own devastated thoughts.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean opened his eyes slowly, the light from the bright sun shining through the window and nearly blinding him in the process. He immediately tensed upon feeling a warm body next to his and reaching for his gun under the pillow out of instinct. It all came back to him when his gaze landed on the small child next to him, curled up and clutching his shirt like he was her security blanket. He quickly let go of his gun and opted instead to gently brush a brown curl out of the little girl's face. He couldn't help the fond smile that tugged at his lips as he looked down at his daughter, still amazed that at this time yesterday he didn't even know he had a daughter. He had barely known Faith for a day, but she had already made a place for herself in his heart.

He thought back to the night before when they had ordered pizza and watched Spongebob on the crappy motel T.V. Even the angel had eaten a slice, hesitantly tasting the cheese and pepperoni like it was some kind of science experiment. Dean had enjoyed seeing that big goofy smile light up Castiel's face whenever Faith would randomly wrap him up in a hug, or tug on the sleeve of his trench coat to get his attention. Castiel was usually so stoic and impassive, but somehow this child brought the angel's walls crashing down. It warmed Dean's heart in so many ways that it almost hurt. He began to wonder if a semi-normal life was possible. Could he pull off being a hunter, and a good dad too without ruining Faith's life in the process?

Then there was the dream that he started to remember, the one he had after he fell asleep last night. He wouldn't tell anyone about _that_ dream. He'd keep it all to himself how he, Castiel and Faith were holding hands while walking through a mall together. How the angel had stopped and bought Faith a balloon, brushing a kiss against her rosy pink cheeks as he handed it to her, and her giggling with excitement. How afterward, Dean had given Castiel a passionate kiss of his own, and told the angel that he loved him more than he had ever loved anyone before. No, he wouldn't tell anyone that.

No, he wouldn't tell anyone that.

It terrified him how much that dream had shaken him to his core. It had made him start to want things that he knew weren't possible. There was no way that Castiel, angel of the Lord, million-year-old celestial being, would want to stick around and help Dean raise a kid that wasn't even Castiel's. The angel would probably laugh in his face at the absurdity of it, and Dean's arrogance to even ask such a thing. So Dean would be quiet, because silence was the difference between losing his best friend, and keeping him around. He would just have to take what he could get, until Castiel realized he could live a much better life than staying on Earth with a fucked up hunter who hated himself more than the monsters he hunted.

He looked around the room, realizing that Castiel was no longer there. He briefly wondered if the angel had already figured it out, until the door opened and Sam came inside, interrupting his dark thoughts. His brother gently closed the door, noticing the sleeping child next to Dean, and a smile slid onto his face along with a look of wonderment.

"Wow," Sam whispered. "She really _is_ your kid."

Dean chuckled a little, glancing down at Faith who hadn't moved an inch. "Yeah, sure seems that way."

"She's beautiful, Dean. I'm happy for you. Really."

"Thanks, Sammy."

Sam walked over to the other bed and tossed his duffel onto it. "Remind me never to take on a wendigo solo again."

Dean almost shot up from the bed in concern, but stopped himself, not wanting to wake Faith just yet. "What happened?" he whispered.

Sam rolled up his sleeve, revealing a huge scratch stretching from his elbow to his wrists. "It'll be fine. Just sucked, is all."

"I'm sure Cas can heal it for you."

"I'll be fine."

The door opened, and Castiel stepped inside. Dean noticed immediately that the angel's gaze landed on Sam, and a sadness flickered across his face. Sam was resolutely avoiding Castiel's stare however, and red flags went off in the hunter's head.

"What's going on?" Dean demanded.

"Nothing," Sam said brusquely, shrugging and laying back on the bed.

"Bullshit. Cas?" Dean turned to look at his friend.

"I - I was just..." the angel faltered.

Dean almost laughed about how terrible a liar Castiel was, but then Faith began to stir. He quickly gave his brother and Castiel a 'we'll talk about this later' glare, and smiled down at his daughter.

"Hey, sleepyhead," he said gently.

The green eyes fluttered open and a gummy smile lit up her face. "Daddy."

And just like that, Dean felt like bursting into tears at that one little word. He was seriously wondering when he should turn in his man card, because it was starting to get ridiculous. "Hey, sweetheart. Guess who's here to see you?" He gestured over to where Sam was sitting.

Faith turned her head and saw her uncle, that smile only growing bigger. "Are you my Uncle Sammy?" she asked.

The younger Winchester nodded. "Yeah, kid. Looks like - " He was cut off by a tiny body hurling against him, and Dean barked out a laugh as Sam fell back onto the bed, his huge arms flailing wildly.

Sam finally recovered, and wrapped his arms around her, Faith looking even smaller than usual in contrast to his large frame. "Mommy told me you're a hero, too," Faith said, and now Sam looked like he was about to cry like a girl. His hazel eyes softened and he cleared his throat.

"Well, I don't know about hero, but me and your dad try to help people where we can."

Faith let go of her uncle, getting off the bed and standing next to Castiel. Her tiny hand reached out for his, and the angel took it without hesitation. Once again, Dean flashed to his incredible dream and he had to shake his head to clear the impossible ideas away.

Dean stood, stretching his arms out wide. "So, when do you wanna gank this bitch, Sammy?"

"Dean," Castiel said with a pointed look.

"Right." Dean shook his head. "When do you want to... take care of the _problem_."

"Can we do it tonight? I wanna get some shut eye. I've been driving all night." Sam laid down on the bed, his big head flopping onto the pillow without waiting for an answer. "Go get some lunch or something," he added, with a wave of his hand.

Dean looked down at Faith. "Well, kiddo, you wanna get some grub?"

"Human children don't normally eat insect larvae, Dean," the angel said very seriously.

Dean just stared at him for a long moment, while Faith giggled. "Cas is so funny!" she squealed. Castiel brightened at the compliment.

The older Winchester shook his head again, and grabbed his coat off the chair. "Come on, let's get going and let your Uncle Sammy sleep."

They ended up at a nearby diner, one of those 50's joints where everyone wore poodle skirts and dressed like James Dean or Elvis. Dean grabbed a booth in the back, with Castiel sitting next to him and Faith across from them.

The little girl gave a wistful smile as she looked around the restaurant. "Mommy and I used to come here sometimes."

Dean felt his face pale. "Shit, I'm sorry. We can go somewhere else."

"No, Daddy, it's fine. I'll just make new memories with you and Cas," Faith told him, picking up her menu.

Dean must have been staring at her with his jaw dropped open because Castiel reached over and closed it for him. "Something is going to fly right into your mouth if you keep it open like that," the angel said in that gravelly voice of his, and damn if that didn't bring all _kinds_ of perverted imagery into the hunter's brain.

After a few minutes of browsing through the menus, the waitress, a woman in her 40's wearing a pink cardigan and a black poodle skirt, came up to them with roller skates and a friendly smile. "Hello, folks, how are you today?" she greeted.

"Fantastic," Dean answered, beaming up at her. "How about yourself?"

The woman, Marjorie as her name tag indicated, flushed a little. "Great, thanks! Do ya'll know what you'd like to order?"

"Cheeseburger special, with a strawberry milkshake," Dean answered, folding the menu and handing it to her.

Marjorie turned to Castiel. "How about you, hun?"

The angel looked at Dean for a moment. "Two slices of pecan pie, and two forks, please." Dean couldn't help but feel his heart flip-flop as those blue eyes locked on his.

"What about you, Darlin'?" Marjorie asked Faith.

The little girl held up her menu, pointing to a picture of animal shaped chicken tenders. "Can I get this, Daddy?" she asked.

"Anything you want, baby girl," Dean replied with a wink.

Faith lit up and showed the waitress the picture now. "I'll have this, thank you. Ma'am."

The waitress looked absolutely pleased as she took the menu. "Your daughter is so well behaved and polite!" she told Dean.

Dean couldn't help but feel the swell of pride coursing through him at the compliment. "Thank you, she's awesome."

"Do you mind if I ask you something?" Marjorie asked.

"Sure."

"Did you and your husband have her through a surrogate? I have a friend who's been trying to find a proper match and it's taken years."

Dean's mouth dropped open for the second time that day. Everyone always assumed that he and Castiel were gay for each other. Too bad it was only _half_ the truth, because unrequited love sure was a bitch. He cleared his throat, and was about to answer, but Faith got there first.

"Daddy and Mommy had me, but she's in Heaven now." Her green eyes landed on Castiel as if confirming once again that it was true. He nodded, and she looked relieved.

A look of sympathy crossed Marjorie's face. "Oh, my. I'm so very sorry. I didn't mean to assume..."

"It's fine," Dean spoke up. "You had no idea." The waitress skated away, and he turned back to look at Faith, who had a curious look on her face. 

"Daddy, are you and Cas together?"

He could already tell that his kid was way too smart for her own good.

Castiel just smirked as he glanced away. Damn angels. 


	5. Chapter 5

"So, are you going to tell me what happened with you and Cas?"

"Is this _really_ the time for that, Dean?"

"Uhh... I guess not. I was just worried."

"We have bigger problems to worry about right now."

The brothers were standing outside a blue abandoned Victorian. Castiel had cased the area earlier and found out that this was where the werewolf had been hiding out since it made a meal of poor Sarah. It was about midnight, and both Winchesters were eager to get this over and done with, especially since there was a little girl waiting for them at the motel that counted on them to eliminate the threat. Dean felt like a failure somehow that he hadn't been there to prevent his daughter from finding out the truth about the supernatural. Maybe if he had known about her from the beginning, he could have kept her mom alive, and let Faith continue believing that monsters weren't real and hunters like Sam and Dean didn't need to exist. He had to admit that he was proud of how brave Faith was being, considering she had witnessed her mother getting killed. He supposed it was because she was a Winchester after all, and Winchesters had to learn at a young age how to be tough and handle all the crap that life throws at you.

He was still concerned about his brother and his angel... _their_ angel. Ever since they had come back from the diner, the tension was still thick between Sam and Castiel, but neither were forthcoming about what had happened. He really hadn't wanted to press the issue, either, in case it was still a sore wound that could cause a huge blowout between the two of them in front of Faith. From what he could deduce, though, Castiel had fucked up somehow and Sam wasn't taking any of his shit. Dean was just glad that the angel cared about them like he did, otherwise he would have just smited Sam into oblivion and called it a day. Why should _he_ care about the petty grudges of a human, after all. Still, Castiel put up with a lot of shit, especially from Dean. He had wondered many times over the years why Castiel had so much patience with him, and didn't just kill him whenever Dean would piss him off.

Lying to each other, kicking each other's asses, the Winchester Way.

They slowly pulled open the back door, Sam watching his back as Dean entered first. The sound of wind whipping against the battered windows made ambiance of the place even more spooky than it already was. He half expected some ghost to come barreling out of the walls and shout BOO! at them. They closed the door behind them, Dean signaling for his brother to take the first floor. He crept up the stairs, keeping his gun and flashlight aimed high, wincing as the rotted wood creaked beneath his weight. That was all he needed now, to fall through the stairs and into some creepy basement. He held his breath as he made his way to the second floor, letting out a sigh of relief when he made it to the top without catastrophe.

He heard footsteps coming behind him and quickly swung the gun around. He was greeted by Sam's annoyed face. Dean sighed and turned back around, checking out the first room on the right, while Sam checked the left. The stench of rotten flesh hit his nose hard as he pulled open the door, entrails and other unmentionable body parts scattered along the floor. Werewolves were so disgusting.

When they had searched all the rooms, they met at the end of the hall, both having found nothing except body parts and disappointment. Sam sighed and leaned back against the wall. "Nothing. I thought Cas said the werewolf was here."

"Yeah, well it's not here now, obviously." Dean glanced around again, hating the feeling of a failed mission.

"So, what's the plan?"

"Huh? I guess we leave, since there's nothing here - "

"I mean with Faith."

Dean shook his head. "I thought you said this wasn't the time to talk."

"That was before we swept the house and made sure it was clear." Sam ran a hand through his chestnut colored hair. "Seriously, man. What's your plan here?"

"I'm taking her in. Going to raise her." Dean was confused why Sam would have thought otherwise.

"So you're just going to drag her along with us on hunts." Bitch face #34 was fully engaged. "Just like John used to do with us."

It was Dean's turn to glare. "What the fuck _else_ am I supposed to do, Sam? You want me to just leave her to the system? Let them find her some crappy foster family who only wants her for the monthly check? Cause' that ain't happening, pal. She's my kid and I'm gonna take care of her."

Sam put his hands up. "Chill out, dude. I just don't want her to end up like..."

"Like me, right? Fucked up and broken and no good for anyone? Is that what you're saying?"

"No, Dean, I didn't say that at all." Sam sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. "I admire that you want to take responsibility."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I want to make sure she has a good life. She's such a sweet kid."

Dean smiled fondly as he thought about the little girl who had stolen his heart so easily. "Yeah, she is. She _will_ have a good life, Sam. Even if I gotta quit hunting forever to make it happen."

"You'd really do that?" Sam said, a shocked expression on his face. 

"If I had to. I want to figure out all my options first. I mean..." Dean swallowed, looking away from his brother. "Cas stays with us all the time now, and maybe we can take turns watching Faith."

Sam was staring at him, his face now unreadable. After a few minutes of silence, which felt more like hours, he put a hand on Dean's shoulder. "I think you need to forget about Castiel."

Dean immediately pulled out of his brother's grip. "Excuse me? What the hell are you talking about?"

The younger Winchester paused, looking like he was trying to figure out how to say something delicately that was most likely going to rip Dean's heart in half. "After this case, Cas is going back to Heaven for good. He's needed there, and... he won't be coming back."

Ripping Dean's heart was a pretty accurate description. He felt like the wind had been knocked right out of him, as he put a shaky hand on the wall. He saw Sam reach for him again but he shrugged it off. "Wh - what do you mean?" he croaked out. "Cas told them that he wanted to stay here! Does he _want_ to leave or something?" 

There was another long silence, and Dean looked up at his brother. Now Sam looked uncertain as he studied Dean like a rat in a cage.

"Tell me what you mean!" Dean shouted, not caring if it would bring unwanted attention to themselves.

"How do you feel about Cas?" Sam finally asked.

His heart began to beat faster as the question registered in his brain. How did he feel about Cas? He thought of all the time they had spent together. Seeing him walk into that barn on that fateful day  some 9 years ago. Castiel saving Dean's ass over and over again. Castiel rebelling against Heaven for Dean, Castiel staying on Earth because of Dean. The way his blue eyes reminded him of oceans on a bright summer day. The way that stupid trench coat made Dean grin like an idiot, because it was so Cas. The way his heart pounded in his chest whenever Castiel stood too close to him, or stared at him for longer than was platonically acceptable.

Dean wiped a sweaty hand across his brow. He couldn't tell his brother the truth, right? Sam would be disgusted that his brother was interested in another man. He would probably disown him and announce that he would be hunting on his own from now on. He had been raised by John, too, after all. He listened to the same homophobic rants and the bigoted ravings of a man who had such bitterness in his heart it was hard to see past it to the good side of John Winchester. He was terrified, to be honest. It was why the moment he realized he had fallen in love with Castiel, after the angel had saved him from Zachariah, he pushed those thoughts deep down never to be seen again. It was safer that way, because it meant people would only see Dean the bad ass, macho, manly man hunter, nothing more, nothing less.

"Dean?"

He snapped back to reality and looked into the hazel eyes of his brother. "Why did you ask me that?" he whispered.

"He is leaving because of you."

Dean thought that if Sam had stabbed him in the chest, it might have hurt less than what he was feeling now. "What did I do?" he choked out, feeling tears stream down his face,and not even caring how it looked anymore. The thought that Castiel was apparently so done with Dean that he was leaving Earth just to get away from him was too fucking much. Normal people left town to get away from people they hated, but Castiel was booking a 1-way trip to Heaven.

"He thinks you don't love him."

Dean hadn't heard that right, had he? Why would Castiel leave because Dean didn't... no. It wasn't possible. "What?" he asked, and he felt like a broken record because he was just so confused and had no idea what to say or do that would make any of this better.

"Do you love him, Dean? And please be honest. Forget the bullshit John told us, just fucking tell me."

"I - I can't tell you. You won't want to be my brother anymore." Dean didn't even recognize his own voice as he talked, it sounded like someone else. He almost wished he were someone else right then and there.

Sam grabbed his brother up in a hug and Dean let him, too emotionally stunted to do anything else. "I would never abandon you for loving someone, Dean. Never."

So, there it was. An open invitation to tell Sam how Dean had been gay for Castiel for years. He lifted his head to meet his brother's eyes, full of genuine caring and concern. "Yeah, Sammy. I have for awhile."

"I know."

He pushed back from Sam, who now just looked smug. Bastard. "If you knew then what the hell was the point of all this?" Dean demanded, his fists clenching at his sides.

"To get you to admit it, idiot. I had to do the same thing with Cas earlier."

Of course. It all made sense now. Sam probably confronted Castiel about his feelings and told the angel... wait... did this mean that Castiel loved him? "You did what?" Dean stammered.

Sam facepalmed, looking like a guy who was just done with dealing with emotionally constipated tools today. "Cas is leaving because he doesn't think you love him. He finds that he is getting too close to you and to Faith, and he doesn't think he could handle the day that you find some woman to be with and raise Faith with, so he is nipping the problem in the bud and going to Heaven. I told him that he could either get over his fear of rejection and tell you that he loves you, or live his life in regret that he never gave what you two have a legitimate chance."

Dean couldn't help himself. He burst into laughter. "Oh my God, Sammy... no wonder Cas looked like a kicked puppy all day."

Sam shrugged. "Had to get him to see the light, and hopefully he does. Though Bobby and I have placed bets on which one of you is going to crack first."

Bobby knew? Son of a bitch!

"Are you kidding me right now?" Dean snapped. "Bobby fucking _knew_ this whole time?"

"I honestly wish you and Cas could see how you look to the outside world. You do realize that staring for long periods of time isn't what _normal_ friends do, right?"

Dean laughed nervously and rubbed a hand across his neck. "The dude doesn't understand human concepts, okay? It would be rude to look away."

"Right, Dean. And I'm the 10th Doctor."

"Well, in that case, _Doctor_ , let's fire up that T.A.R.D.I.S!"

"Shut up, Dean. Now, are you going to go back to the motel and tell Cas how you feel? Or are you going to let him flit away to Heaven forever?"

"Pushy, aren't you Samantha?"

"Only when my dumb ass brother won't stow his crap and let himself be happy for once." Sam grinned at him and clapped a hand on his back.

"Thanks, Sammy."

"Anytime, jerk."

"Bitch."

The tender moment was interrupted by a huge body slamming into Dean. He flew back against the wall, hearing Sam crash into a wall opposite him. The flashlights in their hands clattered to the ground and flickered off. He scrambled to his feet, grabbing his gun out of his holster again and pointing it at his assailant. He couldn't see anything but shadows in the dark house and he pressed his back against the wall.

"Sammy, you okay?"

"Yeah."

"Not for long." The feminine voice came from Dean's left and he pulled the trigger, hearing the bullet his concrete instead of flesh. "Aww, you missed, Dean Winchester." He could sense her coming closer and he fired off another shot. Once again, it missed. He cursed under his breath.

"Who are you?" Dean asked, keeping the gun pointed ahead of him.

"You know who I am, Dean. I'm the one who killed your little friend, Sarah." She laughed, a mocking laugh that made his teeth grate together.

"So it was you. Why did you do it?"

"I was hungry." The werewolf was so close now that he could smell the rotting flesh on her breath.

He grimaced. "No offense, lady, but ever think about flossing between meals?"

He heard Sam running blindly towards them. The werewolf laughed again and hit Sam hard, and his brother landed on the ground with a grunt. He was really starting to hate this bitch. She wrapped a hand around his throat and lifted him against the wall. "Do you know what the best part of this is?" she asked.

"That I don't have to look at your ugly mug in the dark?" Dean snarked, struggling in the werewolf's grip.

"Oh no, my darling hunter. The best part is while you and your brother are playing hide and seek with me here, my mate is at your motel room, tearing your daughter and your angel apart limb from limb."

Dean felt his blood run cold. _No_. Not when he had just gotten hope. Not when there might actually have been a future for them. "Please," he choked out. "Just kill me, leave them alone!"

"It was all a trap, you see. A beautiful trap to lure you here. You killed our father a few years back in cold blood. He didn't even eat people!" she snarled. "You didn't give him a chance, though. You just shot him down like a dog."

A trap. Of course it was.

"So, we killed pretty little Sarah, leaving her brat alive, because we knew she was yours, Dean. All you have to do is look in those green eyes and you can tell." A tongue licked across his cheek and he felt sick to his stomach. "And it worked like a charm! You came right away! And I bet you actually thought you would be able to take the girl home and be a family, didn't you? How sweet. I wanted to take away the things you loved the most, Dean. So Marius is going to kill Castiel and Faith, and I'm going to make you watch while i rip your little brother apart. You'll be all alone, just like we were." Another lick came across his cheek. "Revenge tastes so sweet."

"Taste this, bitch."

The werewolf didn't have time to turn around before Sam pulled the trigger of the gun he had pressed against the back of her head and she dropped. Dean collapsed on the ground for just a second, before he got back up, grabbing Sam by the arm and pulling him from the house. He yanked the cell out of his pocket and dialed Castiel's number.

It rang once, twice. A third time. No answer.

"Fuck!" Dean yelled, sliding into the driver's side of the Impala. Sam had barely gotten inside before he was peeling away from the sidewalk in a hurry. "I can't lose them, Sammy, I just can't!"

"I know, Dean. It'll be okay."

He wouldn't be able to live with himself if his daughter and angel were dead. Not even Sammy would be able to save him then.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warnings: Graphic violence, threats of harm to a child

Castiel couldn't remember the last time he felt so conflicted. Maybe it was somewhere between trying to decide if he should help Dean rebel against Heaven's plan, or choosing to swallow the souls of Purgatory and become God. 

He had made so many mistakes over the years that it all began to blend together, not knowing where one screw up ended and another began. He had always tried to do the right thing during his very long existence, even if most of the time it turned out wrong. He followed his orders from Heaven without question, not even wondering if there was another way that didn't harm the humans he was supposed to protect. He had done it for so long that any emotions he might have felt had been pushed below the surface, because he wanted to believe that it was all God's Will and there had to be a good reason for all the death and destruction he had witnessed. He was an angel, a warrior to be used as a weapon of righteous fury whenever the need arose. He had never had any doubts that he was a good, pure being...

At least, not until he met Dean Winchester.

He could still remember his first impressions of the hunter like it was only yesterday. Truth be told he admired the fact that the oldest Winchester didn't cower in fear when Castiel displayed his wings to cater to Dean's skepticism. Dean merely looked confused, _surprised_ even, that angels actually existed. What Castiel had found most disappointing was that Dean automatically assumed that some nefarious force had brought him back from Hell. It hadn't even occurred to him that someone or something else would want to save him because he was a good and Righteous Man who deserved to be free of Hell's torment. So the hunter's first instinct was to stab the angel, thinking that whoever this being was that brought him back had malicious intentions towards him.

_What's the matter? You don't think you deserve to be saved..._

Even now all these years later, he still didn't think he deserved that.

During all the time he had known Dean, Castiel had watched as Dean sacrificed himself over and over again, blindly running into danger the moment he thought it would save someone he cared about, or even people he _didn't_. It could be a complete stranger and Dean would jump into the fray, just in the hopes of keeping another human being alive longer than they would have been if he hadn't shown up. And that was the whole point, wasn't it? It was why he had refused to let Michael and Lucifer possess Sam and Dean and have their big showdown, leveling the planet in their wake. Dean wasn't willing to risk all those lives just to get peace on Earth. Free will had always been something Dean lived by. It was sadly ironic because Dean Winchester had never chosen to live the life he did. It was destined for him before he was even born.

And Sam, well... he was just as cursed as Dean was. Fed Azazel's blood when he was just an innocent newborn of 6 months, his fate was sealed. Destined to become Lucifer's vessel and be known forever as the Boy with the Demon Blood. Even Castiel had addressed Sam as such when he first met him, and even now the angel felt guilt for treating the youngest Winchester that way. He had grown to love and care for Sam like a brother, and he was more than some prophecy or master plan - he was one of the most gentle souls Castiel had ever met. Dean wasn't the only reason that the angel had decided to stay on Earth. Sam was a huge part of that, too.

He thought to the conversation earlier with Sam, and how angry he had gotten with Castiel. The angel was well aware of what message Sam was trying to convey. As Dean would say, 'nut up or shut up', because time was running out. Castiel may be immortal, but Dean wasn't, even if Death and Dean had become good friends. He knew that Sam's anger wasn't just about not telling Dean the truth though; it was the fact that Castiel was threatening to leave them, and Sam was hurt by the threat of abandonment. Winchesters never admitted when they had been hurt, because that was a weakness. Punching, kicking, slamming each other into walls, that was their method of therapy. He had half expected Sam to toss him around the parking lot earlier, and Castiel would have let him.

And then there was Faith.

He glanced down at the little girl who was curled against him, happily watching some strange children's show about rainbow-colored horses who frequently talked about friendship. He hadn't expected to feel so attached to this child after such a short time of knowing her, and it terrified him. His whole panic had started when he began to think about the future, and Dean eventually finding a nice woman to settle down with that would help raise Faith. Thinking about someone else spending their lives with Dean and the little girl had actually made him feel sick, which, for an angel, was quite a strange feeling. So his first impulse had been to run away and never look back, because it was easier than facing the truth. 

But then he ran into Sam and it all came rushing out of him like a dam had been broken, and now Sam knew the truth. He supposed some of his brothers and sisters would laugh at him and think he was foolish and pathetic, for falling for a mortal man who would never actually love him in return. He found he didn't care, though. He couldn't leave, not now. Even if he was forced to watch Dean be with someone else for the rest of the hunter's life, he would just be glad that Dean was happy, and Faith was taken care of. He deserved that much.

"Are you okay, Cas?"

He smiled down at Faith. "Yes, I'm well."

"You look sad." The girl sat up, ignoring the T.V. and studying him. "Can I help?"

It was amazing how much like her father Faith was. Barely 5 years old and already trying to help others. He didn't know if it was a good or a bad thing though, considering she was a Winchester and it always led to a life of pain and grief.

"No, little one. I'm just thinking about things, that's all." He reached out and gently ruffled her hair, an action that he had seen Dean do a few times lately.

"You're worried about Daddy and Uncle Sammy?"

Well, there was _that_ too, on top of everything else. He often wondered how humans could deal with stress and emotions. He could barely deal with it as an angel.

He nodded. "Yes, I always worry about them. They are my charges."

Faith slid her small palm into his. "Don't be scared. They're both very brave." She said it with such conviction that Castiel felt his heart begin to melt. This child had barely known Sam and Dean for a day and already she could see the good in them that not even they saw. Maybe Faith coming into their life was just what the Winchesters' needed. "Besides, you are an angel. I know you'll save them if something bad happens."

Castiel would certainly do that, no question. "Of course. I always have and I always will."

The girl was silent for a few minutes, briefly watching her show again, her small face scrunched in thought. "You love my Daddy," she suddenly said, not looking away from the screen.

He stared at her, blue eyes going wide for a moment. This little girl was very perceptive for being so young. 

He cleared his throat, not that he needed to, but he wasn't sure what he should say. He had just decided he would keep his mouth shut after all, and not tell anyone about his feelings for Dean. Certainly not Dean's _daughter_. "I-I... well..."

"It's alright, you know." Those familiar green eyes turned back to him. "If anyone deserves to have an angel love them, it's my Daddy."

Once again, he was speechless. He simply gaped at her, feeling something akin to tears threaten to spill down his cheeks. He had only cried once before, back when Metatron had announced that he had killed Dean like he deserved an award. Until that point, Castiel had never thought he would be capable of feeling such intense human emotions. He had barely even understood that he _loved_ Dean, something he didn't truly realize until he had become human for all those months. Yet here was this child, this understanding and non-judgmental _child_ who had already seen such tragedy, and she didn't think it strange for two men to be together. 

If only the rest of the world was so open minded.

He opened his mouth to answer her, but suddenly felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, and he immediately jumped off the bed, pushing the little girl behind him. Something was coming. It wasn't Sam or Dean because he could sense their souls. He reached out with his grace, trying to feel what the threat was but he was just met with gray _nothingness_. It was unsettling not knowing what he was facing.

Faith... he had to get Faith out of here. It wouldn't be safe to fight an assailant with her nearby.

He grabbed her up in his arms, closing his eyes and trying to fly away, but he felt rooted to the ground. Something was weakening his grace, he could feel it. Panic rose in his chest and he reached into his pocket, fumbling for his cell to call Dean.

The door snapped open, hitting the wall with such force that the pictures came crashing down and the door fell off it's hinges. A man stood in the doorway, no... a werewolf. Not the one Castiel had seen earlier when he had scouted the old Victorian. This was someone else. His blue eyes immediately slid down to the necklace around the creature's neck, with Enochian symbols carved into the metal. That was the cause of his weakened grace. He just had to get it from around the man's neck and he would be able to take Faith to safety. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he caused Dean to lose his only child. Castiel figured, at that point, that he would shove his own angel blade into his chest and be done with it.

"Well, well well. What have we here. The Winchester's pet angel and Dean's sweet little girl."

Castiel quickly let his blade slide down his sleeve, keeping Faith blocked behind him. "What do you want?" Castiel demanded, glaring the beast down.

The werewolf stepped fully into the room, a smug look on his face. He gestured to his necklace with a hairy claw. "I came prepared. I had it made just for this occasion. I know those two hunters never go anywhere without you."

"Whatever you want, we can handle it between us. Leave the child out of this."

The other man wagged a finger. "Uh uh uh. She is part of this delicious plan that my mate and I cooked up. She stays right where she is."

Castiel's eyes narrowed. "What plan?"

"Revenge, angel. Sweet _revenge_. One of the greatest motivators in the world. Your darling Dean killed our father, so we lured him here."

"If he killed your father, he had good reason."

The werewolf rubbed his hands together, ignoring him. "Dean Winchester is going to lose everyone he loves today. His brother. His angel. His _child_."

Behind him, Faith began to whimper softly, clutching desperately to his coat, and the angel could feel a fiery rage build up inside him that he hadn't felt in a long time. This beast wasn't going to lay one finger on her. Castiel would die before he let that happen.

"You see," the werewolf continued, leaning against the wall like they were just old friends catching up. "Even as we speak, my mate is tearing Sam and Dean apart. Slowly. Painfully." His mouth curled into a ghoulish grin as Faith began to cry. "Bloody. And now, I'm going to do the same to you. Too bad you don't have all that fancy angel mojo to back you up."

"No, but now you have given me something even stronger than that."

The werewolf smirked at him. "Oh yeah? And what might that be?"

"Motivation."

Castiel sprang into action. He was going to win this, powers be damned. He had to keep this child safe, no matter what it took, even if he was dead by the end of it. 

He punched the werewolf in the face, the beast rocking back on his heels for a moment before snarling at the angel in retaliation. Castiel swung the blade at the beast, missing when it ducked smoothly out of the way. He could feel his diminished grace as he fought, feeling every single blow against his body. He caught the werewolf across the arm at one point, hearing it howl in pain. The werewolf transformed then, turning into his more feral state and rushed Castiel. The angel was thrown to the ground, the blade clattering to the floor. He reached for it but it was kicked even further out of the way. He inwardly cursed, as the werewolf got on top of him, chomping and snapping at the angel in an attempt to tear his head off. He kept trying to reach up for the necklace that was dangling around the beast's throat, but he was having to use both hands to hold him at bay. He felt so weakened and helpless underneath the snarling creature, but he refused to give up. 

Faith was _not_ going to die here today.

The werewolf stopped attacking, and the weight on top of him was suddenly gone. Castiel snapped his eyes open, just in time to see the beast lunging at Faith, who was pressed against the far wall. Without a second thought, Castiel rushed towards Faith, grabbing her up in his arms and turning his back to the creature, just as fangs and claws connected with his flesh. The pain was intense as the wolf's teeth bit through his coat and connected with bone. 

He stood there clutching the trembling child tightly to him, and wishing that he had the power to at least fly her away from here. She had witnessed her mom dying already, she didn't need to see the death of an angel. He didn't think that was something Faith would ever be able to forget, as brave as she was. He clenched his teeth together as claws continued to rip through his skin, fangs gnawing at his bones and pulling away flesh creating a spray of blood around them. He slowly sunk to his knees, still clutching the girl tightly to him, taking every hit the werewolf was dishing out, because he refused to subject Faith to this pain. Maybe if he held on long enough, Sam and Dean would come in time to take care of the werewolf before it was too late.

He felt like a complete failure. Dean had trusted Castiel to care for Faith, and he was failing.

He could feel the blood pooling around him, barely hearing the girl sobbing against his chest, tiny fists clutching what was left of his trench coat. He gently pulled her head back to look into her red rimmed green eyes, Dean's eyes. "Yes," he whispered to her, pressing his forehead to hers. "I do love your father."

She smiled then, a sad little smile that made Castiel's heartbreak. He loved this child, too, he realized. "You have to tell him, Cas. It's not too late."

Suddenly, her terrified face turned into one of sheer determination, and she reached over the angel's shoulder, and yanked the necklace off the beast's neck in one swift movement. The wolf immediately froze when it crumbled to the ground and turned into dust, panic filling his features.

"Wait, please - " he began, but he had spoken his last words.

With the last bit of his strength, Castiel turned slightly, raising a palm to the werewolf's head and pushing all his grace into his hand. Bright white light emulated from within the beast, the werewolf screaming as he was burned from the inside out. The body crumbled to the ground moments later, an unmoving heap of fur and skin and dripping crimson.

Castiel continued to kneel there for a moment, still holding onto the little girl and sweeping his tired eyes around the room. Once he saw that nothing else was coming through the door, he collapsed, the pain finally too much for even him to handle. The darkness overtook him, the last thing he heard was a desperate prayer from a righteous man.

_Don't be dead, Cas! Fuck, please don't be dead!_


	7. Chapter 7

Dean had seen a lot of terrible, horrible things in his life. He was a hunter, it was to be expected.

He saw innocent people get ripped apart by vampires and ghosts. He watched his brother die over and over again, he saw his angel get blown up by Lucifer and drowned by Leviathans. He watched his own mother get burned alive in the ceiling of Sam's nursery. He thought he could handle anything.

How very wrong he was.

The brothers rushed into the motel room, freezing in the doorway as they took in the gruesome scene. The werewolf was lying on the floor, eyes burned out of his sockets. Pictures were shattered on the ground, blood was splattered on the walls. Glass was broken all over the floor. The worse part was the sight of Castiel, curled up in a fetal position, his back torn up so badly, that Dean could see his spine and that nearly every vital organ the angel had was bleeding out profusely on the dingy green carpet. Dean fell to his knees and slowly crawled forward, ignoring the broken glass cutting into his palm and tearing through his jeans, afraid of what else he would find.

_Faith, where was Faith..._

_Was Castiel... dead?_

He felt nauseous the closer he got, tears blurring his vision and his heart beating erratically in his chest.

This wasn't happening. No... he didn't think he would be able to handle it.

It was then he saw that Castiel was clutching something tightly in his arms, something with chocolate curls that had pieces of bloody glass embedded in the locks. Faith. An unmoving, blood splattered Faith. He stopped abruptly, a wrecked cry forcing it's way from his body as he wrapped his arms around himself. Sam fell down beside him, his own face looking terrified and grief-stricken, both unable to fathom what they were looking at, both unable to even breathe at this point.

What a fucking cruel joke life was. It gave him a beautiful, amazing daughter just for her to be ripped away from him?

They were too late. Dean had failed them, just like he failed everything else. This was all _his_ fault.

Then, by some miracle, the little girl stirred and green eyes opened wide, looking first at them in stunned relief, and then at the angel in fear. "No," she whispered, "Cas, no!"

She was alive! Dean lunged forward, taking her in his arms and gripping her to his chest, not quite believing yet that she was here and alive and unharmed. Castiel had protected her, had kept her safe... even at the risk of his own life.

"Cas... he saved me." Faith began to sob, her green eyes staying on the angel. "He let the werewolf attack him so that I wouldn't get hurt! This is all my fault!"

And damn if she wasn't a true Winchester with _that_ statement.

"No, baby girl. It's not your fault. I swear to you."

"Here, let me take her," Sam said, coming up behind him. Dean paused for a moment, nodding briefly before handing her off. Faith clung to her uncle, pressing her face into his red plaid shirt.

"Save Cas, Daddy. Please!"

He swallowed hard, hearing his daughter's desperate plea. He wanted Castiel to be alive just as much as she did, maybe even more, but he had no mojo. How the hell could he possibly fix this? There was no way even an _angel_ could survive that attack. His best friend was nothing but skin, bones and exposed muscle now, a twisted husk of his former self. 

He slowly leaned down towards the unmoving angel, placing a hand against Castiel's face. "Cas, buddy, wake up. You can do this... you've been through so much worse than this and came back to me."

He had. Every single time Dean thought that the angel was done for, that he was really gone _forever_ , he would come back to Dean by some miracle. He had to do it again this time, for the sake of Dean's sanity.

"Cas, please, wake up, man. Come on." He gently shook the angel, feeling desperation set in.

Nothing. Castiel's head lolled limply to the side.

Dean lost it. Before he realized it, his hands were fisting into the bloody and shredded trench coat, shaking the man on the ground. "Dammit, you son of a bitch, wake up! You have to wake up! I have so much I wanted to tell you.. so much I should have fucking said! Please don't do this to me, man. Please..." The tears continued to stream down his face, barely registering Castiel's blood coating his hands. He had been so damn stupid. He should have known this was all a trap. He should have listened to his instincts. 

Castiel had chosen to stay on Earth for Dean, and for what? To end up dead at the hands of some werewolf?

"You fucking asshole! You told me you would never leave me!" Rage filled all his senses and he shrugged off his brother's hand from his shoulder. Rage was always so much easier for him to express than hurt and sadness. "You _have_ to come back to me. I can't do this shit again. Not without you. I... I love you Castiel! Do you hear me? I love you." He closed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion begin to set into his bones. The grief and desperation would come next, and then the inevitable trip to the crossroads. If any demon would even be willing to cut a deal for a _Winchester_ anymore. 

"Well, it's about time."

They all whipped around, Sam pulling his gun out before Dean did. There, casually leaning in the broken doorway, was an archangel eating a candy bar.

"Gabriel," Sam breathed out, slowly lowering his weapon. "What are you doing here?"

Gabriel walked over to where Dean and Castiel were, looking down sadly at his little brother. "Dad sent me. Told me my little bro was about to die."

"He's not dead?" Dean asked hopefully, because let's face it... Dean was surprised he even got one miracle today by Faith still being alive.

"Not yet. But pretty damn close." Gabriel reached down and pressed two fingers to Castiel's forehead.

After a tense moment or two, blue eyes flew open, and Castiel sat straight up, his wounds healed and his body cleaned of blood. Even his trench coat was repaired. He looked around the room, surprised, his gaze landing on Dean. "You're alright," the angel said. "They didn't kill you. Faith!" He quickly looked around the room, visibly relaxing when he spotted her. "She's okay."

"So are you," Dean replied, a smile spreading across his face as it finally hit him. "I thought... I thought you were done for."

"Dean, I'm sorry. I failed you and Faith - "

"What are you talking about? Faith is alive thanks to you!" Dean interjected, pressing a hand to the angel's cheek. "You saved her life, Cas. Thank you."

"I had to. She is your child." Castiel looked at him with that adoring look of his, that told Dean that he was the angel's whole world. How had he not seen it before?

Dean leaned forward, pressing his forehead to Castiel's, grateful that the man in front of him was alive and breathing. He desperately wanted to kiss him with every fiber of his being, but he didn't think either one of them were ready for that just yet, despite the years of sexual tension that electrified the air around them. Castiel deserved to have things done the right way, but now was certainly not the time for that.

Still, he knew he had to say _something_ before he lost the courage. "Cas, I really do... feel _that_ way, you know."

The angel smiled at him, a bit of mischief in those blue eyes. "Feel what way, Dean?" he asked innocently.

"Dammit, Cas. You know what I mean!" Dean huffed, feeling his face get redder by the moment. 

"I know. I love you too, Dean."

Gabriel clapped his hands together, bringing their attention back to him. "Sorry for ruining this moment, but let me be the first to say, thank _Dad_ you two finally got your heads out of your asses. We had a wager upstairs how long it would take. Looks like I owe Balthazar some money," he muttered, looking off into the distance.

"Wait, Heaven knew too?" Dean said, a little too shrill for his taste. "How the hell did everyone know but _me_?"

"Daddy," Faith replied, walking over to stand next to her father. "Even I knew, and I just met you yesterday. You are very obvious."

Everyone burst into laughter then, even Dean, who just shook his head with a dumb grin on his face. "Son of a bitch."

Castiel slowly got to his feet, with Dean's assistance of course, and looked over at his brother. "Thank you, Gabriel, for helping me."

The archangel nodded. "Well, you were willing to sacrifice yourself to save this innocent child, so..." He gave a shrug. "Besides, everyone knows you're Dad's favorite." Gabriel winked. He knelt down next to Faith, another lollipop appearing in his hand, offering it to her. "Hey, kiddo. I'm your Uncle Gabe. You really hit the jackpot with this family. You got the two best hunters in the world and all of Heaven watching over you."

The brothers both looked shocked at the compliment. Gabriel didn't usually pass those out so easily.

Faith grinned and wrapped the archangel up in a hug. "Nice to meet you, Uncle Gabe!"

Gabriel patted her on the back then straightened up again. "Well, kids, I gotta head back upstairs."

"Thanks again, Gabe. Really," Dean said, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck.

Gabriel smirked. "A thank you from Dean Winchester. Now I _know_ you've gone soft."

With another wink, and a snap of his fingers, he vanished.


	8. Chapter 8

Sam had been afraid. Fucking _terrified_ actually.

When he had gotten to that motel room with Dean and seen the chaos and destruction and the blood spraying the walls, he had no clue what to deal with first. The fact that his brother was going through a mental breakdown, or that Castiel was torn apart and most likely dead on the floor, or maybe the whole not knowing if his niece had been ravaged by the werewolf before it had gotten smited into oblivion or if she was okay. None of those things were going to be easy to deal with _at all_ , in fact.

At least if it turned out Faith was still alive, Dean would have a reason not to walk unarmed into a monster nest to deal with his grief over losing Castiel. Sam loved Castiel and he already loved Faith, and he wasn't going to be any more help than Dean would be if they had ended up having to bury two bodies today.

And then by some miracle, Castiel and Faith were okay. 

Despite the odds they were still alive and breathing, and it spurred Dean into action. Sam had been elated when he witnessed Dean finally telling Castiel how he felt. It was just too bad it had taken yet another near-death experience for him to say the words that should have been said years ago. Then again, this was his brother he was talking about, and the touchy-feely never came easily to him.

Dean had always been the tough one of the family. He was the mediator when John and Sam would get into yet another fight, the glue that held their family together. All those times when Sam had tried to quit hunting and live a normal, apple pie life, Dean had let him, because his big brother wanted this life for Sam even less than Sam himself did. Every time he came back after yet another botched attempt at normalcy, there had been an unspoken rule that it would never be brought up again, no matter how hurt Dean was about it. Deep down, he _wanted_ Sam to leave.

To be _free_.

Whenever things got royally fucked up, all Sam had to do was look at Dean, and he would give Sam that fake, reassuring smile to let him know everything was going to be okay. They both knew it was bullshit, but it was easier to keep up the ruse and pretend it wasn't. It was that reassurance from Dean that kept the hope alive for Sam.

He sat in the passenger seat of the Impala now, the day weighing heavily on him. It was 3 a.m, and instead of just staying there until morning, Dean and Castiel had wanted to get far away from there as possible, so they packed up the Impala and they all took off into the night. Sam didn't blame them, really. Their resident angel had almost died again and Dean almost had to live without him - _again_. They were on their way to Bobby's house, and with a little chuckle to himself, Sam realized that he hadn't told their surrogate father any of this yet. There hadn't been enough time. Between the Wendigo, and learning about Faith, and then fucking werewolves... 

The older hunter was definitely in for a surprise when they showed up.

Sam turned towards the driver's side, where Dean kept casting wary glances to the backseat as if he was afraid his angel and daughter would magically disappear at any moment. Faith was laying down in the back, curled up against Castiel, who just looked so utterly exhausted. Gabriel had healed him the best he could, but there were still bruises on his body that were yellowing and green on his skin. He could only imagine what the inside of the angel was like right now. Sam supposed anyone who would have willingly stood there while a werewolf ripped and tore them to shreds would be just a little tired and sore, after all. He also had exerted a lot of energy and grace to be able to keep himself alive long enough to save Faith. Sam had to admit that he had a whole new respect for the angel for doing such a selfless act. He was weakened, defenseless, and he chose to use his body as a shield even though it could have potentially killed him. 

"How are you doing, Cas?" Sam inquired.

The angel started slightly, immediately looking down at the little girl to make sure she hadn't been awoken. "I'm okay, Sam. Thank you."

"I was really worried about you," Sam said quietly, looking out the window at the dark scenery. "Don't think we could have handled losing you, man."

He could see Dean's hands tense on the steering wheel. Sam had no delusions that just because Dean confessed his love for Castiel and everyone was alive that everything would just go back to normal. Knowing Dean as he did, Sam wouldn't be surprised if his brother had plans to send Faith away somewhere, just because he thought she would be safer somehow without him. He wasn't looking forward to _that_ conversation, especially since he could tell that the angel had already gotten attached to the little girl and would just end up kicking Dean's ass for being so damn stupid.

"I'm glad you two are alright as well. The werewolf told me that you and Dean had been dispatched already and I was preparing for the worst." Castiel had meant the statement to sound casual, but his voice ended up cracking at the end, his emotions betraying him.

Sam hadn't known that. Dean sat up in his seat, his green eyes staring into the rear view mirror in surprise. It was times like these that Sam seriously worried about his brother driving the Impala into a ditch one day and killing them all. "Wait... you thought we were dead?" Dean sputtered.

Castiel nodded slowly, averting his gaze. "I - I couldn't think about that yet, though, not when Faith was in danger."

"Shit." Dean raked a hand through his hair, finally looking back towards the road. Thank God. "I don't know what would have happened to Faith if Sam and I - "

"I would have raised her," Castiel said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

Shocked green met blue once again, and Sam silently cursed the eternal staring contest between Dean and Castiel.

"You would have done that? For Faith?"

"Of course, Dean." The angel looked down at the sleeping child who was clutching his trench coat. "I have grown quite fond of her, and I know that if something were to happen to you and Sam, I would have taken care of her for the rest of her life."

"Wow, Cas. I don't know what to say."

"I just hope - " Castiel broke off suddenly, looking away as if he regretted speaking.

"What is it?" Dean pressed, a curious look on his face now.

"I don't want to assume anything."

"Spill it, Cas."

The angel swallowed, a shaky hand patting the chocolate brown curls. "It would mean a lot to me... if I could help you raise her. I am not sure if your confession earlier changes things between us, but even if it doesn't, I would still like to be a part of her life." He looked up at Dean with a hopeful expression on his face. "Unless you find someone else you would be happier with."

Sam slid a glance over to Dean, expecting another freak-out or gay panic from the angel's admission. His brother's face was unreadable though and he frowned, hoping this wasn't going to turn into something that Dean wouldn't be able to fix. His brother was the king of putting his foot in his mouth. 

"Cas, man, I know you might not fully understand human customs yet, but I told you I love you and I - " Dean cleared his throat. "I don't tell that to just anyone. So, I'm in this for the long haul, okay? There is never going to be anyone else... there is _no one_ else that would make me happier than you." At that statement, Dean was gripping the steering wheel again, looking like he wanted to jump out the window. Still, he had said it, and there was no going back now without looking like a complete asshole in the process.

"Do you... really mean that?" Castiel said slowly, as if he didn't quite believe it himself. Hell, Sam could hardly believe it, and he had been the awkward 3rd wheel to 9 years of unresolved sexual tension.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do." Dean smiled at him. "Look, Cas, this whole thing is new to me. You know that I don't do long term relationships. Especially ah - _gay_ \- relationships." He nervously licked his lips, and Sam rolled his eyes. "So let's take this thing one day at a time. Know that my feelings are there and just - give me a little time to get used to all this, okay?"

The angel looked like he had just been told he could have Christmas every day of the year. "Yes, Dean. Of course. I will give you all the time you need."

"Thanks, man. Our life won't always be easy. We are hunters and now we have a kid to raise. But I promise I'll _try_ not to be a huge dick to you, and I'll let you have the last slice of pie, and one day I'll hold your stupid hand in public and let the world know that I'm Cas-sexual."

Sam choked back a laugh and Dean shot him a glare. He put his hands up in defense. "Sorry."

"Any- _way_ ," Dean continued. "So uh... I guess this is the part where I ask you if you'd like to go on a date with me sometime." 

Sam thought it was cute how nervous his brother looked while he waited for Castiel's answer. Dean had always been so smooth when trying to hook up with someone. This was a far cry from random one night stands in seedy bars, though. _This_ was an angel who could level an entire town if he wanted. 

He chuckled to himself, imagining how destructive their first fight would look. He'd have to stay at Bobby's that week, probably. 

"Yes, I'd like that very much, Dean." If the angel smiled any wider, his face would have split in half.

Sam smirked, clapping his brother on the shoulder. "Finally, dude. I'm really happy for you guys."

"Hey, hey. No chick flick moments, Sammy!" Dean said, with a wag of his finger, as if he  _hadn't_ just sounded like a cheesy rom com a few moments before.

"Says the guy who just asked an angel out on a date," Sam teased.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Shut up, bitch."

"Jerk."

Castiel just laughed quietly from the backseat.

They got into Bobby's house around 7 a.m. The sun had just began it's climb over the horizon, and Sam was happy to see the familiar house as it came into view. He had been the one driving the past couple hours, with Dean passed out in the backseat, cuddling Faith to him as he slept. Castiel was in the passenger seat now, gazing out the window with a look of sheer joy on his face. Sam had never seen the angel so happy. It was almost surreal.

Sam pulled the Impala to a park in the garage, turning in his seat to gently rouse his brother.

"Dean, we're here," Sam said softly.

The hunter jerked awake, looking around wildly before he realized where he was. Dean relaxed, and then yawned, careful not to startle Faith too much as he sat up. "Shit, what time is it, Sammy?"

"7. Come on, let's get some rest."

"Bobby will have questions." Dean glanced down at his sleeping daughter.

"He wouldn't be Bobby if he didn't."

Castiel began pulling duffels out of the trunk along with Sam, while Dean carried Faith across the lot towards the house. The front door banged open and Bobby came running out, shot gun in hand. He quickly lowered it when he saw who it was.

"Ya damn idjits. Thought you weren't coming til' this afternoon."

"Yeah, well... change of plans," Dean grunted, walking past Bobby and into the house.

Bobby's eyes swept over the little girl. "Yeah, I can see that." He shot Sam a look, that said he expected answers.

"I'll let you know what's happened," Castiel said, as he walked up to the older hunter. "Sam and Dean need rest."

"So do you," Sam interjected. "Dude, you almost _died_ last night!"

The angel waved him off. "Sam, you're my brother, and I do love you, but if you don't get inside and get some rest, I will be forced to do something drastic." Castiel's eyes narrowed in challenge, and the younger Winchester huffed, slipping past Bobby and through the front door. Damn angels.

He went up the stairs, pausing by Dean's bedroom to peer inside. He couldn't help the smile that slid across his face. Dean was wrapped up in his red and black comforter, Faith cuddled up facing  
him. Sam never would have thought in a million years that this was possible, but here they were. Alive and well with family surrounding them.

He gently closed the door and walked to his own room, not even kicking off his shoes or changing his clothes as he flopped down onto the bed. He fell asleep with a new feeling of hope in his heart, that maybe, just maybe, everything really would be alright.


	9. Chapter 9

Bobby Singer loved his boys.

He hadn't at first, but it was nothing to do with them personally. They were kids, and who liked those? 

The first time he had met them, John Winchester had dropped them off at Bobby's front door like sacks of garbage, peeling away in the Impala like he couldn't get out of there fast enough. He was a hunter, he didn't want to take care of some damn kids. But then he began to notice how 6-year-old Dean was like a little soldier, always keeping his back straight whenever Bobby addressed him, saying "Yes, Sir," or "No, Sir," to the older hunter. Dean had an acute awareness that belonged in the eyes of an army veteran, not a small child. He always kept a trained eye on Sam, as if it was his job, because in his mind it was. One time Bobby accidentally set the fire alarm off during the night and Dean was out of bed in a flash, carrying his brother outside to safety without hesitation, then returning for Bobby.

So, Bobby decided to let them be kids instead of fighters.

He taught Dean how to toss around a baseball, and showed Sam how to ride a bike. He tucked them into bed at night, and was the first person there when they would wake up sobbing from their nightmares. Even now, at their age, he went into their rooms whenever one of them began to scream, hugging them tightly to him until they passed out again from exhaustion. He didn't want to know what those boys dreamed of anymore... they had both been to Hell, and Purgatory, and fought in wars that would make trained soldiers lose their mind in under a day. In the morning, they would eat breakfast together, and Bobby would never mention how he had held them through the night, reassuring them that they weren't back on a torture table or trapped with Satan in a cage. The grateful looks they gave him were more than enough for him. They were his boys, no matter how old they were. That would never change.

Castiel had become another important part of Bobby's life, too. It had admittedly taken Bobby a long time to warm up to the angel, partly because he was a supernatural creature and partly because he had betrayed Sam and Dean a few times over the course of the years. Eventually, the stiff, awkward man in the trench coat became a regular face whenever the boys would visit between hunts. He taught Castiel how to make coffee for Sam and Dean, and how to make burgers and Dean's favorite pie (he may have had ulterior motives for that last one) and the angel eagerly took in the information as if Bobby had just told him how to find the Holy Grail. It became clear that the angel loved Sam and Dean, in different ways of course, and thus earned Bobby's trust, no matter what mistakes Castiel had made in the past.

After all, "I did what I had to" was the Winchester-Singer family motto.

Bobby sat now at his kitchen table, pouring some whiskey into his lukewarm cup of coffee while Castiel finished brewing a fresh pot for the brothers. It was too damned early for this conversation, but his curiosity and concern for the situation was getting the better of him. He took a drink, setting the mug down and waiting for the angel to join him. A few minutes later, Castiel slid into the seat across from the table.

"It should be done soon," the angel said, smiling at Bobby.

The hunter nodded, clasping his hands together. "So..." he began, looking pointedly at the angel. "What did I miss?"

Castiel laughed a little. "Do you wish to know the summary or the full version?"

"Summary."

The angel nodded, pausing for a moment to gather his thoughts. "Dean has a 5-year-old child due to unprotected sex with a random woman. The mother was recently killed by a werewolf. Sam and Dean went to kill the wolf, but it turned out there were _two_ wolves. One of them came for Faith and I, and it nearly killed me because it had procured a necklace that weakened my grace and rendered me powerless. Gabriel saved me. Dean told me he loved me. We are going on our first date sometime soon - "

Bobby spit out the sip he just took of his coffee, some of the liquid dripping down his beard. "Come again?"

Castiel looked embarrassed. "Maybe I shouldn't have told you that last part."

"The hell you shouldn't. Dammit, I owe Balthazar 50 bucks now." He should have known better than to make that bet.

The angel tilted his head. "For what?"

Bobby adjusted his trucker cap. "The bet on if you and that idjit would get together already or not."

"Did everyone bet on that?" Castiel looked more amused than insulted. "And we aren't officially 'together' yet."

"Yep. Apparently, Balthazar has more faith in you two than everyone else did, because I didn't think you and Dean would get your heads out of your asses."

"I didn't either. I almost left," Castiel said sadly, staring down at the red tablecloth.

"What? Why?" Bobby demanded.

"I didn't think Dean felt the same way. I wanted to leave before he found someone else and it got too hard to watch." Castiel looked up guiltily at the hunter. "I was going to go to Heaven and never return."

"Ya damn idjit!" Bobby said, shaking his head. "You're like one of my sons, Cas, and if you left I would have kicked your ass myself if I had to."

Castiel smiled at that, resting his arms on the table. "I believe Sam was close to it the other day. He told me I should just let Dean know how I felt, but I was afraid."

Bobby leaned back in his chair. "Everyone gets afraid, boy. Sometimes you just got to jump into the fire and see if it burns."

The angel stared at him in confusion for a minute, before understanding crossed his features. "Ah, I see what you mean now."

"So the girl," Bobby started.

"Faith Deanna."

The older hunter chuckled. "Of course. How's she taking all this?"

Castiel absently picked at the sleeve of his trench coat. "She is a brave child, for being so young. Do you know she saved my life?"

Bobby raised an eyebrow. "You neglected to say."

"I was holding the beast at bay with Faith in my arms, keeping him away from her as best as I could until the brothers could come help, but I was fading fast. She reached up and yanked the necklace off, which gave me just enough powers to smite it before I collapsed." A fond look passed over the angel's face, and it was clear to Bobby that Castiel cared deeply for the little girl already.

"So she knows you're an angel then?"

"Yes. She seemed to be awed by it when we first met. Unlike her father..." Castiel added, a bemused look on his face.

Bobby remembered that night well. Dean had just come back from Hell by some damn miracle, and suddenly a man in a trench coat came strolling into the barn they were in, sparks flying (both the literal and metaphorical kind) and announcing that he was an angel of the Lord. He had been asleep for most of the encounter, but he knew that Dean thanked the angel for saving his life by attempting to kill him with a demon knife. Irony was never lost on Bobby.

_"I'm an angel of the Lord."_

_"There's no such thing."_

"So what's going to happen with Faith now?" Bobby asked, taking another drink of coffee.

"Dean and I are going to raise her together," the angel said proudly, and once again Bobby wondered how an angel goes from being stabbed in the chest by a hunter, to helping that hunter raise a child. Still, it wasn't the strangest thing that had happened in their lives, and that was saying something.

"He's not going to drag her around on the road, is he? I watched Sam and Dean go through that shit with John."

The angel looked uncertain for a moment. "We- haven't really discussed details. There's been no time."

Right. They were all too busy being mauled by werewolves. "We can talk more when Dean's awake. You gonna get some rest?" Bobby asked. The angel did look exhausted, after all.

"I think I may lay down with Dean and Faith for awhile. Gabriel healed my wounds, but my grace got weakened greatly." Castiel stood. "Can I help you with anything?"

Bobby waved him off. "Go get some rest, boy. We can deal with all this later today."

The angel nodded and trudged up the stairs.

"Ready to pay up, Singer?"

Bobby rolled his eyes, glancing at the blonde angel in the doorway. "What's the rush, Balthazar?" Bobby demanded, getting up to pour himself another cup of coffee.

"I've been waiting for this for years. And you lot thought I was crazy for thinking it would happen!" The angel was smug, as he held out his hand to the hunter.

Bobby sighed, reaching into his wallet. He yanked out 50 bucks and slapped it into Balthazar's waiting palm. "There! Happy now?" he grumbled.

Balthazar winked at him. "Ecstatic." With a snap of his fingers, he was gone.

Bobby wondered when this had become his life.


End file.
